I'm surprised FEMA even knows when hurricane season is." --Jay Leno, "President Bush was in town. I haven't checked Romney's position today." He doesn't really understand, first of all, what amnesty means. --Jay Leno, "The government of Iraq is under a lot of pressure from President Bush to find a fair way to share their huge oil profits. One girl got paid with a military base in her home state."

--Jay Leno, "President Bush picked [Iraq war architect Paul] Wolfowitz to head the World Bank in 2005. To which Rudy Giuliani said, 'I would have been worth that much if I just had one wife too.'" --Jon Stewart, "To get a pleasant reception, the president only needed to fly to a country referred to as 'the poor man's Kazakhstan.'" As you know, we are now entering our fifth year of making very good progress in Iraq.

He heard a Nor'easter was coming and said, 'Great. --Jon Stewart, "Republican candidate Mitt Romney says that Hillary Clinton is wrong when she says it takes a village to raise a child. --Jay Leno, There's another one of those prostitution scandals down there in Washington, DC.

A proposal Bush said he would study.

And she also said today in an interview that he sometimes paid $300 an hour just to have the hookers talk to him because his wife didn't listen to him. So right now, Dick Cheney is being rushed to Cuba by Michael Moore." --Jay Leno, "Leaders from the eight wealthiest countries in the world are gathering in Germany for what they call the G8 Summit. This guy was cheating on his hooker with another hooker." I know it's 4/20, but even I'm not that big of a pothead." I know, it's like closing Mount Rushmore -- in that there's a secret prison inside Teddy Roosevelt's mouth. --Jay Leno, "All the candidates jumping on the environmental bandwagon.

The first chance I got to photograph these hummingbirds was in the trail going down into the Caribbean slope, along the Ngwoini creek (at about 1500 meters above sea level, and several kilometers to the east of Cerro Santiago and Cerro Colorado, so supposedly well into the, The third day, we visited the main road along the slopes of the Cerro Santiago massif, at about 1700 meters above sea level). Alberto Gonzales doesn't know what happened, but he assures you, what he doesn't remember was handled properly." His approval rating has dropped so low the only thing he's above now is the law."

And what better title for that leader than one evoking an ineffectual, tyrannical dynasty ultimately slaughtered by Communists in a filthy basement deep in the Ural Mountains?" How can he compare these two wars?

Bee: "Yeah it would be five to five, that's correct." A transcendent struggle between good and evil? It's crazy to think that a guy who did not get the most votes, who's not good at what he does, is famous despite the fact that he is consistently horrible, would get the chance to go to the White House and meet Sanjaya." See, this is so wrong. ... You know that you're not the party of diversity when even people in New Hampshire are saying, 'Man, those guys are white.'" Apparently, it was the first time a 400-piece orchestra has ever played 'The Wheels on the Bus.'" --Stephen Colbert, Prime Minister Tony Blair of England just announced that he will step down next month, which means that President Bush is going to lose his closest foreign ally. President Bush got a little confused. --Amy Poehler, "Are you aware that it's Friday the 13th?

It's a Christmas show and they tape it in June. A Republican forced out over a sex scandal involving ... a woman?!" --Stephen Colbert, Speaking of elections, last week Republicans held their first presidential debate. The mountains of the Tabasará range, in western Panamá, are physically (and ecologically) separated of the main Talamanca range by the Fortuna depression, making this an area of subespecific  and especific endemism. Well, as it turns out, what he was hiding is everything." I was expecting splits in this species! A documentary about the gay bomb will be broadcast on both the History Channel and Bravo. President Bush says he's gonna miss listening to Tony Blair, because when he closes his eyes, Blair sounds just like C3PO." The 'Plan B' discussion was difficult for Bush, because it involves two areas where he's extremely vulnerable -- Iraq and the alphabet." Then Bush said, 'It's just like the Hokey Pokey.' His first beneficiary? That's a shrewd move on Cheney's part, aimed to protect him from evil-doers savvy enough to know how to use Google Earth but too dumb to realize they can still find him on MapQuest. " The first casualty was Randall Tobias, a deputy secretary of state who resigned last week after admitting to using the escort service.

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