She loves super sad drama television, cooking, and reading. Accepted to UC Berkeley, Penn State, Colorado, UCLA, NYU. This essay could work for prompt’s 1 and 7 for the Common App. Frances was born in Hong Kong and received her bachelor’s degree from Georgetown University. Doing Great! Do your research and browse through profiles of students accepted to see essays, stats, and advice. When I was in high school, I joined a public service club that volunteered at local homeless shelters. The admissions folks should finish reading your essay thinking, "This is a student we want to join our university community.". On rare occasions, the thrills and action occur at times of congestion on the 91 freeway, yet that still isn’t exciting. Read more. Accepted to UC Berkeley, UCLA, UC Davis, UCSD, Cal Poly, SDSU, UCSB. The pre-2016 UC personal statement prompt #1 stated, "Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations." With tons of healthcare workers putting their lives on the line and working around the clock... Getting waitlisted is undoubtedly disappointing, but it's not the end of the road. When (and why) should you send additional materials to colleges you’re interested in?

You are most welcome to check the personal essay examples that have been completed by our skilled writers on various topics to help you with your own personal statement. I watch the flames mount a moment more, before hurtling toward them, yelling my chant, “Zardi-ye man az toh, sorkhi-ye toh az man!” Keep reading. Things to consider: A leadership role can mean more than just a title. There have been many aspects of my life that have influenced me to study Government and Political Science, but perhaps the most important of them has been my family. Let me help you! Many UC essays I read do a good job of telling the story of the past/present. Our UC essay prompt 1 sample is there purely to provide you with ideas as to how you can go about writing your own personal statement. UC Berkeley Class of 2019 graduate working in the biotechnology industry as a Research and Development Associate for a drug stability testing company. The kids tried talking to me, but since I didn’t understand English they just started laughing at me. The admissions officers want to get to know you.
After all, if there's one subject you know something about, it's the surroundings in which you live. Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped … Winners of the AdmitSee 2020 College Scholarship. My eyes filled with tears, my teacher immediately called home and moments later my mother came to take me home. Interested in reading these students’ full UC essays that got them into UC Berkeley? They volunteered at local shelters, organized benefits, and helped the less fortunate. © 2020 AdmitSee Inc. All rights reserved. See how they got in, and how you can too! My eyes watch them dance. UC applicants now have to write 4 short essays of the 8 prompts provided, but recent UC college students had to write 2 longer essays. By using ThoughtCo, you accept our, How to Ace Your University of Wisconsin Personal Statements, The 2020 Common Application Essay Prompts, Common Application Essay Option 3 Tips: Challenging a Belief, Sample Weak Supplemental Essay for Duke University, Tips for an Admissions Essay on an Influential Person, A Sample Essay for Common Application Option #7: Topic of Your Choice, Tips for the 8 University of California Personal Insight Questions, Tips for the College Interview Question "Who Has Most Influenced You?
But what really makes you you? Test scores, GPAs, and other quantitative data do not really tell the university who you are; instead, they show that you are a capable student. Click here to see our pricing, Melissa, UC Personal Statement The only stumble in the personal statement is the use of the verb “to shadow” when the author discusses following her parents around to see what they do at work. I quickly became the President of the club and was responsible for recruiting new members. Writer and Coach, About Us | Testimonials | Privacy Policy | Terms and Conditions | Sitemap. For tips on the new essay requirements, read this article: Tips and Strategies for the 8 UC Personal Insight Questions. This is all very good. I grew up with a mother and father who were very involved in public service.

Make sure your response to prompt #1 is specific and detailed, not broad and generic. I made the best of my childhood by capitalizing on the opportunities afforded to me. Our premium plans offer different level of profile access and data insights that can help you get into your dream school. The participation ladder bernoff, and other types of micropolitical engagement and fun they are stronger students pursuing doctoral degrees.

In closing, my dreams have been shaped both by family and by the community in which I live. 5 Ways to Move from the College Waitlist to Acceptance. ThoughtCo uses cookies to provide you with a great user experience. Dr. Allen Grove is an Alfred University English professor and a college admissions expert with 20 years of experience helping students transition to college. The personal statement is, obviously, personal. To answer the prompt effectively, consider the following: For any essay on any college application, always keep the purpose of the essay in mind. Fire can grow in the same way people can, absorbing some things while merely illuminating others. I would stumble into the kitchen to find my grandma squatting over a large silver bowl, mixing fat lips of …

My eyes watch them dance. My parents have also helped me to understand how elections and the government operate, thanks to my mother’s candidacy when I was younger. Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over time. It's a question that every freshman applicant to one of the nine undergraduate UC … Berkeley. AdmitSee is dedicated to making the college applications process easier for students everywhere. Note that this question has much in common with the Common Application option #1 on your background and identity. Her favorite person on Earth isn’t actually a member of the AdmitSee team - it’s her dog Cooper. 3 Steps to Tailoring an Essay for Early Decision, College Tours 101: Everything You Need to Know, Waitlisted?

It would be better to say that the author “rode along” or “accompanied” her parents as they went about their day. “Shadow” as a verb has a relatively negative connotation – for example, a detective may “shadow” a suspect. I live in Corona, California; a small city that advertises itself as a bright landmark once notable for it’s exhilarating racetracks. It was my first day of first grade, the teacher spoke a different language, and strangers simply stared at me with their judging eyes. View full profile. I attend the Developing Virtue Boys School (DVBS) on the grounds of the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas, a large Buddhist monastery in rural Northern California, where rubbing elbows with monks, devoted laypeople and peacocks is the norm.

My family was underprivileged growing up, but I did not feel it was a hindrance to my growth. Before answering the question, consider the purpose of the essay. By the way, we offer up to 23% discounts for early applicants! The flames flicker, vivacious and bright, growing taller and taller. However, there is neither much excitement in my town, nor is thee much to do. It's a question that every freshman applicant to one of the nine undergraduate UC campuses had to answer. UC Berkeley '21 (History/Political Economy double major, Pre-Law). UC Essay Example Tip #2: Discuss goals for the future. He goes into excellent detail about his parents’ influence, as well as his experience in high school and how discussing important issues with others affected him. Unlock any of our packages or search our undergraduate profile database to find specific profiles that can help you make an informed choice about where to apply! It tells the admissions officers what you value, what gets you out of bed in the morning, what drives you to excel. Continue reading. Take a look at our UC personal statement prompt 1 example if you want to see how you could go about answering that prompt. ", 5 Tips for a College Admissions Essay on an Important Issue, "Gym Class Hero" - a Common Application Essay Sample for Option #3, How to Transfer Colleges: A Guide for Success, Common Application Essay, Option 1: Share Your Story, Tips for Writing a Winning College Transfer Essay, 2020 Common Application Essay Option 4—Solving a Problem, suggestions for improving your essay's style, Ph.D., English, University of Pennsylvania, M.A., English, University of Pennsylvania, B.S., Materials Science & Engineering and Literature, MIT. Here are 5 essay excerpts from UC Berkeley students from the Class of 2019: The flames flicker, vivacious and bright, growing taller and taller. Unlock all of them in one go with our UC Berkeley Package! See profile. Low SAT. The author should have written a clearer outline to guide his writing, as it would make his personal statement flow better and be more concise. But don't be fooled by how accessible the question appears to be. 1. However, the structure of the personal statement seems thrown together. Reflecting back on my childhood, I have come to appreciate the little things that have led me to where I am today. The UC essay examples below reveal how two different students approached the prompts. COVID-19 and Your College Essay: Should You Write About It?

Public service has allowed me to become a more productive part of my community and has given me the teamwork skills I’ll need when I major in Government and Politics. The first prompt on the UC application is: 1.


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